Nomad Ink

Thursday, June 28, 2007

frustration

Dear God, let me see if i can post an entry without losing it this time. last time was an exercise in frustration and sent me into a bit of a tailspin; it feels like a major defeat to spend time writing and have it disappear despite my best efforts to post. makes me want to not share any writing at all. are those gunshots or firecrackers in the near dark distance? the neighborhood's going downhill again, my middle-aged gay male couple neighbors are moving out b/c they can't take in anymore. i'm worried abt who might move in. cars idling in the alley, then speeding off; unfamiliar teenagers with ravaged looks sauntering down the alley; crazed-looking women ringing my doorbell and asking for $16 to "call a locksmith cuz i locked my keys in the car..." let's see if this'll post. my lilies are out, beautiful, and roses too, and some things i don't know the names of... first meal of the summer w/ sonja and andy, my CSA share-mates; it was dreamy, the grilled zucchini like candy, the sugar snap peas like candy...green candy nonstop in the languorous back yard...